Ever had one bad moment ruin an otherwise okay-ish day?

Like someone gives you a weird look at the bakery, and suddenly you're spiraling like, “Did I say something weird? Am I weird? Do I exist too much?”

Yeah. Me too.Here’s the thing:

You’re not too dramatic. Your brain is.It’s called the negative bias – and it’s totally normal (and kind of annoying).

So, what is the negative bias anyway?

In simple terms:

Your brain is wired to focus on bad stuff more than good stuff.Why? Because back in the day, remembering which berry bush gave you diarrhea or which cave had the angry tiger actually mattered.

“Bad = danger” kept you alive.These days, there are fewer tigers, but your brain hasn’t quite gotten the memo.So instead of calmly enjoying your coffee, it might be scanning for existential threats like:

  • a passive-aggressive email
  • the one thing you forgot to do yesterday
  • or that one weird thing you said in 2014

Our minds love to zoom in on what’s wrong. It’s part survival, part habit. But just because it’s normal, doesn’t mean it has to run the show.

So how do we deal with it?

Great question, thoughtful internet reader.Here are 5 gentle, Happy Hue–approved tips to calm the bias beast and bring a little more light into your everyday:

1. Start with the “but also…” trick

You had a tough morning. BUT ALSO you made an amazing cup of tea. Your boss gave you weird feedback. BUT ALSO your friend sent you a sweet meme. Your brain says “This is awful.” You say, “Yes... but also, it’s not only awful.”Tiny shift. Big difference.

2. Create a Joy Jar (yes, seriously)

Keep a jar. Or a box. Or a sock. And every time something small & nice happens — write it down and pop it in. A kind word. A cozy moment. A song that made you dance like nobody was watching (but your cat definitely was).On bad days, dip into it. Let your past self remind you that not everything is terrible.

3. Limit your “doom scroll snacks”

Negative bias loves a news app, a comment thread, a quick dip into social media hell.Notice when you’re feeding it too much. Not to shame yourself, but to gently say: “Sweetheart, maybe let’s not read 17 takes on world collapse before breakfast.”

4. Celebrate neutral

We tend to think happiness = huge joy explosions. But honestly? A day without a breakdown is a win.Celebrate neutral days. Boring moments. Calm coffee cups. Let “not terrible” be enough sometimes.

5. Talk to your brain like it’s a well-meaning but dramatic aunt

“Oh honey, I see you’re trying to protect me with all these worries. That’s sweet. But I’ve got this.” (Then go water your plants and breathe for 30 seconds.)

Final Thoughts – aka: You’re Not Broken

If your brain tends to focus on the negative – congratulations, you’re human. But you also have the power to guide it toward warmth, laughter, color, and calm.

Not with toxic positivity.

Just with compassion, awareness, and tiny daily rituals that remind you:Life is hard. But also, sometimes... it’s really beautiful.You’re allowed to feel all of it.

And you’re allowed to train your mind to notice the sunlight too.Keep collecting your colours.

Christine 

P.S. A few sciencey links (that don’t suck):

Baumeister, R. F., et al. (2001). Bad is stronger than good. Review of General Psychology.→ One of the classic studies showing why we focus more on the negative than the positive.

Greater Good Science Center:

https://greatergood.berkeley.edu→ Beautiful, research-backed articles on emotions, gratitude, and emotional resilience.

Harvard Health Publishing:

https://www.health.harvard.edu→ Helpful tips on rewiring your brain’s focus from negative to positive.Rick Hanson, Ph.D. – Hardwiring Happiness